Step work

[vesiheina]

Here you can share your experiences on doing the step work.
How have you worked personally?
What have you done in your group?
What has been good?
What was not so great to you?
Where you would like to get tips from others?

[vesiheina]

Step four
We did step four in our group using the old booklet of ACA. In it each problematic character is described with about ten lines, like 'Hate': how does it show in your life: angry thoughts, throwing objects etc. And below it was a short description on life, where hate has dimished, with about ten lines, telling how it feels when you recover: fealing more peaceful, being able to tolerate situations calmly, etc.
We first read the texts, about 20 min. Then each of us wrote these lines on a sheet of paper. On the other side the bad ones, and on the other one the good ones. Then we took 10 min. silence, and all wrote their experience down.
After that we shared what we wanted of our writings.
This was the beginning of truly work step four in our group. One character at the time.

[vesiheina]

Step six
We just had a weekend working step 6.
On Friday evening we started reading the big book text step 6 for 2 pages. As this was the first time some of us ever met, it was also an introductory meeting. We each used 5 min., took a break for about 10 min., and speaked for another 5 min, and closed with serenity prayer. In here we end it with words: I rise my head from shame, I take your hand. Together we can do, what we can not do alone.
On Saturday morning we worked step 6. All defaults of the character, survival characters (laundry list) and good ones (end of step four) were each written on small pieces of paper, and spread across the floor in a big room. A little was read from the big book step 6. Then we all walked in silence around the room, and took the word that somehow was the most important. Then everyone placed the word on an empty drawing of a three of charactes, and told why it was chosen. As thre is many characters, we repeated this two-three times, and closed this session with a serenity prayer.
Then we had a break for lunch and walking outside.
On the other working session we acknonledged that we are not ready. We change every day, but we can not control, how. We are ready and willing to change.
We wrote on a piece of paper the character we like to leave us or incorporate peacefully. First we thanked this character. It has developed to save us, but now it could step down and take it easy. How have we benefitted of it? Even addiction can be thanked for relieving pain.
Then we considered, how we can use the phrases or prayers to support us. Is there another character, that could replace the unwanted one - like giving thanks to higher power instead of envy. Could we celebrate each tiny success in this healing, with writings in a diary or textmessage to others. Or we can develop a rule to our mind - if I do this, I will also do this. Like: if I'm found myself judging my self too hard, I will gently fondle my head and say: its enough!
This session was also finished with a serenity prayer. In the evening we had an aca meeting started with two pages in big red bog step 6.
On Sunday we finished with a final aca meeting, sharing our thoughts and experiences during this weekend, concerning step 6.

[vesiheina]

Sometimes people complain being stuck on some step.

Its good to remember, that all our program, inculding steps, are suggestions. These suggestions are based on experiences of people in ACA.

This is not a strict program, that you have to follow step by step, proceeding only when you are ready. I do not want to depress anybody, but we will never be 'ready'. Each day life will provide us with new experiences to struggle with.

If some step does not open to you, go to the next. We people are different, in different phases in our lives. Some time one step is more suitable than another. Even if you feel, that you are not doing anything, your higher power is working on the problem.

At the end working all the steps is our goal, but we may need time to do this.

Working steps and healing in ACA is like eating a huge dry bread without water. You need time to do it.

[saran]

During these two years, I've noticed that my healing process hasn't gone straight, from the first step, acceptance, to the second and third and so on.
There was a time when I thought that I've failed badly because of this jumping back and forth, but recovery's not about like accomplishing courses in math or playing golf.

(Well, today I have a feeling that I've lost my way, completely!, with this 12 step program.)